Archive for the ‘Friendship’ Category

What Will They Say?

Tuesday, September 15th, 2009

Every so often I wonder about my funeral. (Now, I know this is not a pleasant thought, but it has a significant purpose for me). When I think about that day, I wonder what people will say about me, you know, what kind of person I was and what kind of impact I made on the world. This process is quite humbling and motivating. It’s humbling because I know God is the one who controls life and not me. I know my life will end one day. It’s motivating because it causes me to give my life to the things that really matter – God, eternal values, family and friends. 

Therefore, each day I live, I am writing, or at least have opportunity to write the eulogy that I would like read at my own funeral.  Here are some questions that have been very helpful to me as I have thought through this process. They may be helpful to you, too, as you write and live your own eulogy

1. How do I want to be remembered?

2. What personal characteristics do I want people to remember me for or by?

3. What do I want to have accomplished? 

4. What will have been the most important to me in my life? 

5. What will my lasting legacy be?

Have you ever asked yourself these kinds of questions? If so, how did the process make you feel? 

If you don’t mind, take a moment to think through one of the questions above and leave your answer here. Grace and peace.

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Carriers

Thursday, September 10th, 2009

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Recently, I spoke to some Christian athletes. I asked them how did they normally respond to hardships (torn ACL/ MCL/PCLs, loneliness, being ridiculed for their faith). They responded: fear, anger, “why me?”, self pity, aggression, despair, turning to abusive behavior, apathy, and turning to God. I told them they were carriers – carriers of pain, so they could ultimately be carriers of comfort. Just as I encouraged these athletes, Paul encouraged a group of believers in a town called Corinth.

He reminded them that afflictions were inevitable for the follower of Jesus. Many were being persecuted, imprisoned, and oppressed by unbelievers – all because their relationship with Jesus. But, Paul wanted the Corinthians to know that, in the midst of their trouble, God was their source of divine help. He would come to their side and help them to have godly responses. Then Paul gave two purposes why God allowed suffering: so, they could experience direct and personal comfort from God, and then from that experience, give God’s comfort to others (2 Corinthians 1:3-4). God allowed affliction and brought divine comfort so that the Corinthians might have the capacity to enter into another person’s pain, affliction and sorrow and bring comfort to them.

As we experience sufferings, affliction and pain of all kinds – physical, spiritual, emotional – let us remember that God will bring direct and personal divine comfort to us through his word, by the Holy Spirit and through fellow believers. Thus we are CARRIERS of pain, so we can ultimately be CARRIERS of COMFORT – God’s comfort. Sometimes we carry God’s comfort with consoling words and other times words are inadequate and get in the way. Thus, we must carry God’s comfort by the ministry of presence.

We are not comforted by God to be comfortable. Nor are we comforted by God to become consumers and connoisseurs of God’s comfort; we are comforted by God to be comforters. God comforts us so we can be CHANNELS and CARRIERS of COMFORT.  

How has this been true of you lately? How can your suffering and God’s comforting you through it, help you empathize with others? 


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My “Ride or Die”

Monday, June 8th, 2009

Jackie Robinson was the first black to play major league baseball in the modern era (Moses Fleetwood Walker played 42 games in 1884). Breaking baseball’s color barrier, he faced jeering crowds in many stadiums. While playing one day in his home stadium in Brooklyn, he committed an error. The fans began to ridicule him. He stood at second base, humiliated, while fans jeered. Then, shortstop Pee Wee Reese came over and stood next to him. He put his arm around Jackie Robinson and faced the crowd. The fans grew quiet. Robinson later said: “That arm around my shoulder saved my career.”  In that moment, Pee Wee Reese was Robinson’s “ride or die.” A “ride or die” is someone in your life who will be there with you through thick and thin. They will do what they need to do to help you make it through difficult times. In short, a “ride or die” is a very close friend. King David had a“ride or die” list, and we can find that list over five chapters in 2 Samuel (15-19). David’s “ride or die” list include: Ittai, Zadok, Abiathar, Hushai, Shobi, Machir, Barzillai, and Joab. Their examples help us to see what a true “ride or die” looks like. A true “ride or die” will:

1. Pledge absolute allegiance to you, even if it means death
2. Tell you the truth about your life and decisions 
3. Love you when you have nothing else to give
4. Put you first 
5. Not let the past to ruin the friendship 
6. Accepts you, even when he/she doesn’t understand you or agree with you 
7. Will stand with you regardless of risks involved
8. Lay their lives down for you 
9. Give without being asked and they ask for nothing in return
10. Give out of love with no hidden agenda

No price is too high and no inconvenience too great for a true “ride or die.” As I look over this list of characteristics, my “ride or die” list is very short, maybe 5-7 deep. Based on these characteristics, and others you can add, prayerfully make your own “ride or die” list. Who are the people who would be on your list? Why? How can you demonstrate your appreciation for their friendship to you? Would your closest friends consider you a true “ride or die?” 

There is a “Ride and Die” who sticks closer than a brother. (Proverbs 18:24)

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