All right, I’m back. Ladies, thank you for your insightful and helpful feedback. I will be posting all your comments later this week. Now that the women have spoken, let’s hear what men want from their women. Now, I will be speaking in broad brush generalities, but I am sure that if you ask your husband, significant other or any other man about most of these (some things on this list are just for married couples only), he will tell you that I am in the house or not far from the kingdom. What I have done today is broken the list up into two parts. I will post one today and the other part of the list on tomorrow. Tell me what you think and feel free to send me more suggestions. Here we go:
1. We want and need our women to know that our sex drive is powerful, persistent and normal. We are not weird because we want sex all the time (Single brothers, God wants you to wait until you are married. Until such time, take up karate or jujitsu to get rid of all that energy. I digress). Women, sex is to us what affection is to you – our #1 need. Satisfying sex reassures us in our manhood. Real sexual fulfillment for us is nearly impossible unless we can sexually fulfill you. Brothers, we must handle the business of emotional security, daily affection, validating her feelings in order for our wives to feel like having sex with us. I am still learning that sex begins, not in the bedroom, but when I perform small acts of sacrifice, affection, and attention. Robert Lewis says, Husbands need sex to feel close to their wives, but wives need daily closeness to feel like having sex with their husbands. Let the church say Amen!!!!! (Single men and women, honor God with your bodies and wait until marriage)
2. We want and need our women to know that we like helping to solve your problems, but a woman who solves her own problems while we watch, is an instant turn on. Ladies, we desire a self-sufficient, secure and confident woman. Men need to be wanted and needed by their wives or significant other, but we desire women who have their own identity within the relationship and are growing in that identity. We want you to be independent, with the ever increasing tools to solve your own problems.
3. We want and need our women to know that they should not expect us to enjoy shopping with you. Do I have to say anymore?
4. We want and need our women to know that you can have sex with us any time you like. see #1 (This is for married couples only. I repeat, for married couples only)
5. We want and need our women to know that if you like or show genuine interest in baseball, football, basketball, hockey, Pool, Soccer, working out (lifting weights, running), Ping Pong, Nascar, anything remotely recreational, we just might fall in love all over again. Men desire their wives or significant other to be a recreational companion. It’s cool to workout with the boys, but a man really likes it when he can play with his wife or significant other. Keep it holy, y’all.
6. We want and need our women to know that we want a manipulation-free relationship. Men want no manipulation of any kind. We don’t want to read your minds or interpret signals. We don’t want to be forced to move faster or accept blame when things go wrong. We don’t want you to use tears, silence or even withholding sex to get your way. When men feel like they are being played, they shut down.
7. We want and need our women to know when the game is on, we will pay attention to you if you are nice about it. If you bark at us or nag us, we will shut down.
8. Did I mention you can have sex with us any time you want?
9. We want and need our women to know that anytime you cook for us, especially our favorite meal, we’re happy. Tonia’s dressing, cherry cheesecake, and cranberry chicken is off the chain – Fa Sho!
10. We want and need our women to know that we need to go out with just the guys once in a while. When we want to go out with just the guys, it doesn’t mean we don’t want to be with you or we’re doing something that we not supposed to; it simply means that we want to hang out with the guys. There is a camaraderie that exists between guys that I really can’t explain. It really is a guy thing.
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